Spencer, Hank, Bruce and Janet.

Do not judge less you be judged. A few weeks ago I called out the blogworld judging all the non-updaters. Let's see 12 days have passed since I "sold out" as my good friend Kyle said, writing a blog wrought with tired cliches. Ha Ha, Kyle's a real treasure of a friend, the kind that will tell you the truth. He was correct of course, I didn't want to dissapoint my cousin's wife by not Grid Blogging so I turned to Picasso to bail me out. Never trust a dead guy who paints odd shaped boobs. Anyways, I have time now so lets hope I get this thing right.

For the past two weeks I've spent my evenings sitting across the table from men and women on the edge of despair. No, I'm not talking about Flames fans (that joke would have worked much better if the Flames weren't currently on a five game winning streak. Crap.) The men and women I speak of are currently living in Calgary without a home. The homeless. Many of them came here looking for work but found no rent control instead. Some of them had their lives torn apart when their wife, partner or room-mate took off leaving them broke or worse, broken. Some of them made poor choices and are now addicted to. . .pain. All of them touched me. Messed with my mind and touched my heart. Each night, as I headed home, I felt grateful to be me and depressed they are them. Not dressed up and no place to go. We conducted 700+ interviews over a 10 night span. Of the dozens I personally conducted there were four that stood out.

The first was Spencer. As he walked towards me I saw his face was contorted, and then it wasn't, and then it was again. You could tell he was aware of what was happening but was powerless to do anything about it. Like hitting a patch of black ice. As he shared his story he talked about medical school and how he had become a nurse. "It's my passion, he said, I love taking care of people." One day he woke up and everything changed. Dystonia took care of him. Dystonia is a neurological disorder that causes abnormal muscle contractions. Spencer got emotional as he talked about losing his job and no longer being allowed to take care of peole. Without a source of income or support he was now forced to survive at The Drop In Centre. Survive. "We don't live here, a man shared with me one night, we exist." When it came to his wish, Spencer asked for Victor Frankl's classic "The Search for Meaning." He once knew where to find it but now wasn't so sure.

Next was Hank Williams. He chuckled as he told me his name. "Actually, it's Henry", he said. Life emanated from his eyes. Like he had found a way to not just exist. Hank had been homeless for 10 years which meant he was now 71. I know. Oh yeah, and he's paralyzed. I can't imagine what would be worse, being homeless at 71 or being paralyzed. Perhaps they're the same thing. Hank went on to share that he had 13 children (7 step children) and 28 grandchildren. I finally blurted out at one point "what on earth are you doing here?" He replied "I prefer this environment, its much more positive then living with my family." I was dumbstruck. Most of us couldn't survive a night at The Drop In let alone live there for years. But Hank was. And had chosen it.

A few nights later I met Bruce. Bruce is a 22 yr old Maritimer who moved to Calgary for you guess it. . .work. Bruce was brutally honest as he shared how alcohol had taken over his life causing him to lose his job and place. As he shared I couldn't help but notice he was different. He stood out. He wasn't like the others I had talked to, he was sharp, sure of himself, even seemed to know what he wanted. We ended up talking for several minutes as he told me tales of growing up in Nova Scotia, playing hockey with Sidney Crosby but being forced to quit when he hurt his shoulder. BTW - he claims Crosby is the biggest A_____ H_____ he's ever met in his life. When it came to his wish he said "all I want is to go home for Christmas." He then admitted how he hadn't told his family. I imagined his parents, sitting at home in N.S. talking about how proud they were of Bruce, moving west to get a job. Little did they know, their son was living on the street. When I asked why he hadn't told his parents he shrugged his shoulders and said "why tell them, they don't need to be burdened by my mess, they have their own challenges. Besides, if they knew, they'd send me money they didn't have or come up here and get me. Why would I put that kind of stress on them" Bruce impressed me.

Janet hit me the hardest though. She came up behind me and said "hey, don't I know you." I turned around seeing a girl I recognized but wasn't sure from where until she said "you're from church, right?" Then it clicked. Janet had attended my youth group 4 years ago, very infrequently mind you, but she had come, even to BC for Got Faith. When it clicked I almost broke down right there in the middle of The Drop In Centre. I talked to her for several minutes wanting desperately to save her yet not knowing where to begin or if she even wanted to be rescued. She ended up thanking me for chatting then wandered off. She looked so lost. And she was. She still is.

We completed all the interviews on Friday. Most of them have been added to the website - http://www.homelesspartners.com/. Many of the people have had their wishes granted but hundreds more still wait. (Btw - if you are moved by their stories or wish to participate you can grant their wish by mailing their gift to the shelter. If you are interested, let me know.)

This project was both heartbreaking and inspiring, eye opening and moving. I encourage all of you to either start this project in your own city or start volunteering at your local shelter. I realize this last part is turning into a commercial but I'm not sure I care. My life was changed.

John